Almost every couple fights. If you don’t, maybe you need to deepen your relationship so you have something meaningful to fight about! Now try to diffuse those arguments in a small space!
Let me first say that there’s a difference between a productive disagreement and a fight. Often, we’ll disagree on something, but we’re genuinely interested in what the other thinks or where they’re coming from, so we try to listen and reach a common ground.
However, when we truly disagree, words are spoken, and feelings are sometimes (i.e. all the times) hurt.
I can’t say that I enjoy fighting with my spouse, but it happens. He is my best friend, but even my best girlfriends and I don’t get along all the time.
Now, imagine having an argument in a 400 square-foot space. There’s nowhere to go to get away from each other!
Here are a few tips.
Go do something else.
After a big blow out, you both probably need some time away from one another. Go do the dishes, start some laundry, sweep the kitchen floor, or play with the kids.
It’s not a big space, so even if you can’t exactly get away from each other, you can distract yourself with another task.
Our RV is pretty big, so I can go to the living room while he goes to the bedroom. If you only have a one-room trailer, you may need to step outside and shake out the rugs or simply busy yourself doing something that makes you look busy for a while.
Stop talking for a while.
Don’t have anything to do? Read a book. Take a shower. Organize your closet or pantry. You don’t have to pretend to look busy. There’s always a good way to pass the time while avoiding – I mean giving each other some space.
If you’ve already said some hurtful things, it’s best to stop talking for a while so you don’t say anything else to make the situation worse.
Even if you’re right. I’m serious. Swallow your pride and just say you’re sorry. Nothing goes farther than just telling your spouse you’re sorry for losing your temper, even if they were the first one to lose it.
It could initiate an apology from them or make them realize that they were in the wrong. Even if it doesn’t, you’ve done everything you can now, so maybe they just need a bit more time to come around.
I’m a big fan of the saying “never go to bed angry.” If you’ve just had an argument and there’s nowhere else to sleep, snuggle up in bed together.
Often, in our house, if we were fighting, one of us would go sleep on the couch. Now we have no choice but to share a bed, because we don’t have another place to sleep.
Sometimes snuggling up to one another is all we need to soften our hearts to one another and make things better. Talk about trying to diffuse arguments in a small space!
Tread these waters lightly. This doesn’t work for everyone, and sometimes it doesn’t even work for us, but it’s worth a try.
If you’re new to fighting in a small space, you’ll get used to it. Actually, I was surprised at how quickly we got the hang of it. We both have short tempers, and having four rowdy kids doesn’t help, so things tend to escalate quickly and often.
However, thanks to learning how to argue in a healthy way, we seem to manage it pretty well these days. These are my best tips for how to tackle the problem head on, but I’m sure once you start traveling, you’ll find some of your own, too!